Jennifer Lopez:Endangered Species

Gigli 2 Anyone?

GenerationNext99
Hey. Hazim here. Anyways, just got back from a party. It was awesome. The drinks were as crappy as always, the kind that makes you think they got it from the back of an old restaurant. Yech.
Anywas, anyone need an update on Jennifer Lopez? I don't, but I figured that I'd write about her before she becomes extinct. Her career is falling down faster than William Hung's 15 seconds of fame did. You know the whole fur thing with Ms JLo? The one where a ton of animal lovers including Pamela Anderson were dissing Jennifer Lopez for wearing fur? Well, apparently, Ms. JLo has decided to respond, not by taking off her fur coat, but by appearing in an ad for FECAL which will feature her naked on a white fur rug with stuffed fur animals placed strategically on her. Way to go, Jennifer Lopez! Now your fanbase will prolly be 99.9% smaller. Apparently, the ad will have these words on it:
Next To My Skin, I Like Theirs The Best
See, the trick isn't to bow down to haters, it's to shove it back to them. hahaha. Jennifer Lopez needs a pulse check. In my opinion, the whole fur thing isn't an issue. If you have no problem with a beaver beingslaughtered for its fur, then go ahead and wear fur panties if you want. If you squirm at the idea, then don't waste your money. That's all. Anyways, she just finished up work on her new album. Apparently taking a leaf out of Shakira's book, Ms. Jennifer Lopez has decided to release an all Spanish album with producers Marc Anthony and some guy named Estefano. Her album will be called Como Ama Una Mujer. Anybody speak Spanish? Her representatives or whatever have claimed that the songs on the new album are big songs that require big voices. In my honest opinion, Jennifer Lopez's voice is as light as Mary Kate's wrist. And that's talking LIGHT. It'll prolly be along the lines of Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony's performance at last year's Grammys. In other words, so cheesy you can use it to trap all the rats of New York City. And there are a lot of rats. I think that while Jennifer Lopez's movie turkeys and flop CD Rebirth continue to hurt her celeb status, her butt's career remains healthy. Everyday, somehwere around the world, somebody mentions Jennifer Lopez's famous ass/derrierre/butt/whatever. Without being perverted, I will admit to Jennifer Lopez having fine curves. At least if Jennifer Lopez fails, the butt can pick up.
Go Butt!
On the subject of Jennifer Lopez, she has also just finished a movie with her hubby, Marc Anthony called El Cantante. I'm guessing it'll be along the lines of Gigli. In other words, don't watch it if there's "heartwarming" and "touching" next to STARRING JENNIFER LOPEZ in the trailer. Or if you have to see it, bring a barf bag. You're gonna end up using it. That's what the constellations read anyways.
Did I just write all that on a woman who has million dollar insurance on her butt? I guess I did. I think Jennifer Lopez has a good business sense. Don't forget guys, she did manage to earn millions from her perfume and clothing line. She could have turned out to be like a hotter looking Donald Trump, but she's still stuck in her musical rut. I will always think Jennifer Lopez is gorgeous, no matter how much her music sucks. Hazim. Out.

PS Jennifer Lopez is an endangered species. Save her from extinction? Well, save the tigers, save the rhinocerous, but JLO? .......as long as she doesn't decide to make Gigli 2.